Friendly Advice How to Avoid
Death and Other Inconveniences

“A tome of wisdom for parlous times.”
“Chuck Goldstone is a man beset by demons...and Chuck battles them like an intrepid Quixote with a single weapon: schtick. He is funny. He is gloriously insane. Plain and simple, he makes me laugh.”
      Ron Suskind
      Pulitzer Prize Winning Writer and 
      Best Selling Author
“...combining a peculiar power of observation with a gentle ability to turn the mirror on ourselves and make us chuckle at our silly human tricks.”
      David Brown    
      Producer and Host,  Marketplace
"Mr. Goldstone's THIS BOOK IS NOT A TOY is wise, witty, and hilariously funny!"
     Patrick McManus    
     Humorist and author of They Shoot 
     Canoes, Don’t They?

In this wry, wistful, deeply wise, and trouser-wetting funny collection of essays, nationally known humorist and public radio commentator Chuck Goldstone shows us why we humans are a fluky bunch, agents of our own undoing, who dive blindly into life, too often underestimating the potential for danger and overestimating our competence.

This Book Is Not a Toy! is Goldstone's summa, his collected advice about life’s hidden peril. Sharing his own off kilter experiences and those observed in his fellow species, he spelunks the deep regions of overconfidence and shows how we have replaced common sense and 100,000 years of collective mammalian wisdom with naiveté, oafishness and bad judgment.

  - The Spirit of Adventure
  - My Mother’s Warning
  - The Home Depot Chain Saw Massacre
  - You’ve Been Warned
  - Bully for Fear
  - Wildlife Television
  - We Are No Match
  - To Be Safe, Always Carry a Mongoose
  - That’s Entertainment!
  - Dating a Woman from Snake Country
  - Communing with Dangerous Pets
  - Not an Animal Family
  - No One Will Call Me “Lieutenant”
  - A Smudge in the Record Books
  - Cutting Short Life in Your Spare Time
  - Adventure Vacations
  - The Revenge of Mountains
  - Flights of Fancy
  - Your House Is Out to Get You
  - Instruments of Our Personal Destruction
  - Patio Peril
  - Don’t Say We Didn’t Warn You: An Epilogue

Goldstone lays out the buffet of peril that tempts us, such as buying sharp edged power tools at Home Depot, cohabiting a planet rife with animals who would slaughter us as soon as look at us, indulging in dangerous pastimes, scaling vengeful mountains, or simply lighting up the backyard barbecue grill. 

Purveyor of mockery, angst provocateur, and just plain smart ass, Goldstone is a willing participant in the often befuddling activities of life, and in doing so, speaks for most of us, rubbing our noses in the problems we create for ourselves and reminding us we should know better. If laughter is a health risk, then be forewarned. This Book Is Not A Toy! will have you laughing all the way to the blood bank.
Friendly Advice on How to
Avoid Death And Other Inconveniences

St. Martin’s Press   
$23.95 ($33.95 Canada)



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